3 days!

We meet our kids in THREE days! We are as ready as we could possibly be to welcome home three kids we have never met. We have everything assembled, cleaned, and organized. We have visited schools, made appointments, and planned for our absences from work.

As I was cleaning some things, I found my journal entries from my first pregnancy. I was shocked at how "quickly" I have forgotten the terrible pain of our loss. We were so excited, and a bit worried, until our 8 week appointment. Then we felt reassured that everything was perfect. We were back to pure joy and imagining the future. I don't have any entries that are not happy (what happened to the ones after we found out that the baby had died??). It just is like a frozen frame of two people, in love, waiting for the birth of their first child. I cried when I read it. It just seems so unfair that a special time like that was taken from us. I really had forgotten how life felt before all the bad news started. I haven't really thought about the trauma of it all in quite some time. I thought about sharing the pages with my husband, but I figured they would have no positive effect on his day, so I will file them away in a different hidden corner. It's okay that I forget those feelings and focus on the feelings of now.

THREE DAYS UNTIL FOREVER FAMILY! We are super excited! We are praying for a smooth transition and lots of happy memories :)

Advice

I will never get used to people's unsolicited advice. Yesterday I met a woman through a mutual acquaintance. She is a retired counselor, and was asking questions about my forever family. After a couple of minutes, she went on a bit of a tirade about adopted kids and made these points clear:

They ALL have attachment disorders. 
You better be sure you know EVERYTHING about their mental health history before you decide. 
Once they have seen abuse there is NOTHING that can change the outcome of who they become.

And so on. So basically she thinks that this is a terrible idea and all adopted kids are crazy and will never be able to lead a good life. Okay, I am aware of challenges of adopting kids through foster care. I have taken classes, read books, watched webinars, and prayed about these things. I have spoken to the kids' counselors and read their histories. I know this will not be easy. Does she think I haven't thought of this? That my husband and I just woke up last week and thought, "Wow, kids in foster care are easy to get and have no problems. They sound like a perfect way to build our family without having to struggle." I believe she had good intentions, but it definitely did not come across well. I KNOW there will be lots of struggles! I have LIVED through lots of struggles already with foster parenting, and I know it will not be an easy road, but I really do not need anyone, let alone random people, implying that I am making the biggest mistake of my life. My advice? Be supportive of people who may be choosing a different path than you. They have their reasons.